How to Eat Prawns

Well, let's just start out that I met a new friend for dinner this evening in a cute Italian restaurant in Burlingame. And for you folks who love Italian, I highly recommend this little place. (Sapore Italiano, Burligame, CA. Although, I know maybe 5 people out here that read my blog. So, for you five- check it out.)

This is not your neighborhood Pasta House or any trattoria on the Hill(for you St. Louis people). Nor, and I gasp in disgust that I even have to use this as an example, the Olive Garden.(Again, for those of you who may not know me well, the thought of the actual suggestion of eating there makes me lose 5 lbs in vomit.)

Now, I am assuming I have your attention, as for some reason I have decided to become quite unpleasently graffic in discussing the OG. (btw, the OG is not quality Italian food, and I have to be kind of a snob about it, since I did use to live on the Hill. Not to metion, I was 26 the first time I ever ate there, and realized I wasn't missing a thing except a better meal. Oh how I miss the fish bowls at Rigazzi's.)

Since the menu was in Italian with nice little English interpretations, I went for something easy, as to make sure I knew I could eat it all. (Which I did, and I'm glad. For my lovely company, and new friend David picked up the check.) Experimenting menus and picking random items at a place you've never eaten at could be risky. I like to play it safe. (I know, I'm a wuss.)

So, when you're at a nice eatery, and you are faced with colossal shrimp on your plate, do you eat it with your fingers like back in the 'hood, or follow those ettiqutte classes you took in Girl Scouts? I opted for the latter.

I had no idea that "skills" I learned at an overnight GS outing at the Ramada Inn by Six Flags when I was 12 would ever come into play.

Which fork? Are they supposed to be on the left? Where does the glass go? Do you place the knife blade in or out at the top of the plate to signal you're done? Did anyone see me hit my glass on my teeth since refined eating establishments don't promote the use of a straw unless you are under the age of 6? And do you chew the ice? Does anyone ever spit it back into the glass in hopes that no one saw? I have fallen victim in the past to ice choking episodes for that reason. Why am I giving any thought to such a ridiculous notion that anyone cares? I don't know.

Yes folks, this is how my brain works. I have been trying for 28 years to figure this out. I have come to the conclusion that to try and figure out why is like finding out who killed JFK. In the end, someone knows, and won't fess up.

With my ridiculously impecible memory for random unnecessary memories and trivia knowledge of minute details that have no value, this is why I think of these things.

BON APETIT